Saturday, December 30, 2006
To My ex-Lover,
I miss you so much! Ive been dying to be with you these past few months, but we both know why we cant be with each other. You very well know how much i love you and how i always have and always will but its time to move on and let go. We both have our reasons. Lets live our lives seperately for the moment and when the right time comes well know what to do. So as for now i have to say goodbye to you my sweet darling. &&I Love You..
Sincerely Yours,
Your Beloved Past
im signing off this odd year and starting a new one.. its been quite a ride.
and im sure everyone who shared a moment or two with me had atleast a wee bit of fun.
im shifting to a different gear.
a fresh start.
we'll see what happens.
thank you fans.
http://thebookworthreading.blogspot.com
6:09 AM
Friday, December 29, 2006
its been quite a ride since my last entry.. its been a rollercoaster of events and of course emotions.. i havent blogged since then coz.. uhmm well.. lets just say ive been missing out on alot of things including my "me time".. anyway.. i miss sleeping.. hahaha.. wala lang.. and eating.. goodthing im gaining some weight na!.. hmm christmas season.. hahaha. my witnesses are the only ones who can tell what made me
happy-er.. moving on.. ive been dying to tell everyone what made me
busy these past few days.. or maybe i wont nalang.. you know what.. right in the middle of typing this entry i decided to visit komi's blog coz i miss her like shit.. and read about all the people she misses.. tapos wala lang.. na-feel ko ang christmas bigla. hahaha baliwabaliwan lang sir!. teka.. ang hari ng aking paraiso ay hinahanap na ako..
toodles.
7:05 PM
Friday, December 08, 2006
To the left(x4)
Mmmm to the left
Everything you own in the box to the left
In the closet, thats my stuff
Yes, if I bought it, then please don't touch (don't touch)
And keep talking that mess, thats fine
Could you walk and talk, at the same time?
And its my name thats on that jag
So go move your bags, let me call you a cab
Standing in the front yard, telling me
How I'm such a fool, talking 'bout
How I'll never ever find a man like you
You got me twisted
You must not know 'bout me
You must not know 'bout me
I could have another you in a minute
Matter fact, he'll be here in a minute (baby)
You must not know 'bout me
You must not know 'bout me
I can have another you by tomorrow
So don't you ever for a second get to thinkin'
You're irreplaceable
So go ahead and get gone
Call up that chick, and see if shes home
Oops I bet you thought, that I didn't know
What did you think
I was putting you out for?
Because you was untrue
Rolling her around in the car that I bought you
Baby, drop them keys
Hurry up, before your taxi leaves
Standing in the front yard, telling me
How I'm such a fool, talking 'bout
How I'll never ever find a man like you
You got me twisted
You must not know 'bout me
You must not know 'bout me
I could have another you in a minute
Matter fact, he'll be here in a minute (baby)
You must not know 'bout me
You must not know 'bout me
I'll have another you by tomorrow
So don't you ever for a second get to thinkin'
You're irreplaceable
So since I'm not your everything
How about I'll be nothing? nothing at all to you (nothing, nothing)
Baby i won't shed a tear for you (I won't shed a tear for you)
I won't lose a wink of sleep (a wink of sleep)
Cause the truth of the matter is (truth is)
Replacing you is so easy
To the left to the left
To the left to the left
Mmmmm
To the left to the left
Everything you own in the box to left
To the left to the left
Don't you ever for a second get to thinking
You're irreplaceable
You must not know 'bout me
You must not know 'bout me
I could have another you in a minute
Matter fact, he'll be here in a minute (baby)
You must not know 'bout me
You must not know 'bout me
I can have another you by tomorrow
So don't you ever for a second get to thinkin' (baby! hey yea)
You must not know 'bout me
You must not know 'bout me
I could have another you in a minute
Matter fact, he'll be here in a minute (baby)
You can pack all your bags we're finished
Cause you made your bed now lay in it
I could have another you by tomorrow
Don't you ever for a second get to thinkin'
You're irreplaceable
1:29 AM
Saturday, December 02, 2006
hmm.. met up with shem then went to drews for awhile.. tapos went to cantina to meet up with isa h. then went to meatshop to meet up with LJ,, then we later found out that she wasnt there so we ended up with calvin?, angel? and gab?.. haha friends ni shem.. went to chickenboy to eat isol.. when they left na dale stayed at our table for awhile.. until ardy picked us up.. so went to macdo marcos first to pick up her bestfriend then went to carlos where dino king teddy mamaru duane bitong and someone i dont know were there.. so after watching Michael Jackson Beyonce and Evanesence we left na for our house.. hay naku kagulyow! drank for awhile then ate.. met up with eman for awhile to talk about stuff at sho's.. then played inbetween na ulit sa house with everyone else.. talk about goodluck.. won 200+ while shem won around 120something rin.. haha whoopsie.. finished around 7 am then we all went to mcdo to eat.. went home around 8 at ang masasabi ko lang sir? magulo. masaya. tapos. hahaha. we were supposed to go swimming but we weer all too tired and wasted to do that.. hahaha my legs are giving up on me already.. so un.. haha.. wala pa kong tulog.. crap.. sarap nito i bet. hahaha.
9:45 PM
Friday, December 01, 2006
went to drews for awhile.. then.. boom.
9:28 PM
he called me up today.. surprised ako.. wala lang.. i am bored to death once again.. im too lazy to dress up pero wala lang.. ilog? eto na ba ko? bea has a family dinner somewhere.. everyone in our house left.. mix gill jm jm rd king masa dino and teddy is in riverbanks.. ako pano ako? dito lang.. cge katamad eh. hahaha.. well see 8 pa lang naman eh..Ü
7:45 PM
WEDNESDAY.. Cantina with people, inbetween then redtag.. WHOOPS. john tucker must die? more like jd.. hahaha.. joke lang.. atleast theyve got everything ironed out na.. went to mcdo marcos for awhile then went home na.. them masa, mix and jm went here tapos nagpainom sila kasi panalo sila sa color game wahahaha,,sandamak mak na sermon ang inabt ko sakanila bat daw nagtitiis ako sakanya bat daw bobo ko and shit.. whatever..
THURSDAY.. stayed home all morning mom and i got to talk already.. and everythings ok na.. around mga 4 or 5 duane and mamaru went here.. talked till mga 7 then went to drews to pick up shem saw bernard steve and si pogi plus kara and mar tapos nagkatrouble sila shem so hidni na kami sumama went back to my place ate dinner usap nanaman then nagtxt si masa na nasa labas daw sila ng gate namin.. whoopsie.. plus mix jm jmax and chino pa pala bumili sila ng alak then rd called tapos sunod daw sila ni baby teddy.. haha fun dami kasing tao funny nga eh.. when they puffed na everyone was hella noisy and i didnt give a shit hahaha.. kasi naman 4 lang kaming umiinom lugi naman ata.. hehe ayun.. ung napagusapan namin the day before.. parang wala lang.. shet. hahahaha. crap man.
7:33 PM
Tuesday, November 28, 2006
gino and everyone else went to my house awhile ago.. they cooked uhmm lamb something mashed potatoes and spare ribs..the food was great! i loved it! hehe fun kahit magulo.. well.. if i had to choose between all of them and *
happyfeet*.. wala pang 1 second.. sisigaw ko na HAPPYFEET.. kung papapiliin ako ung nangyari ngayon o walang ginagawa kasama si
happyfeet.. tangina. HAPPYFEET parin noh! wala lang.. i miss him so much.. hindi nga pala ako lumabas today! woke up around 12 and he called.. then spent the entire afternoon watching tv and doodling on random pieces of index cards.. anyway shem called me up.. and told me that they were coming over.. soo yun.. fun a lil booze and a lil puff here and there.. and heaven sent food (haha BTW. i love mashed potatoes) chill lang.. pero parang ayaw chumill ng boses niya eh.. galit ata.. hahaha.. ay teka. selos? hahaha kidding.Ü
11:57 PM
Little Things
You know what I mean. It’s like going on vacation somewhere for a few weeks with you not being able to pinpoint exactly how but your funds start dwindling. Then you realise it’s all those everyday cab fares that you hardly notice spending on- which adds up to quite a lot.
It’s going to school and having the mean guard greet you and tell you that those black leather slingbacks you’ve been wearing day-in day-out are not allowed and that you have to go home and change them which leads you to miss a whole session of class and being unable to get those extra points you could have really used. It’s staying up all night typing your report and finding out that no matter how much you kick it and pray and cry, the printer just won’t print properly.
It’s those little white lies you tell for various reasons. Like a diplomatic answer to one friend’s question when asked if the eye makeup she worked on for hours looked pretty (when it doesn’t). The slightly off-centre-truth you tell when asked about the whereabouts of someone you’re covering for. The little based-on-a-true-story fib about what you will be doing this afternoon that you say so that you can do what you want to do.
It’s that careless remark you say off-handedly which you come to regret when you realise what you just said to the person who suddenly started screaming at you. It’s the stupid little comment said for no reason other than to seem comforting- only it backfired and made the person being comforted even more heated up. And it’s what you failed to say when it was expected of you.
It’s when you let your temper go unchecked and hit someone you care about- only to deeply regret it afterwards. It’s the sms you failed to reply to because you were busy that made your parents think you’re up to something no good. It’s the comforting shoulder and words you did not offer when your girlfriend who was expecting it was telling you her troubles.
Little things mean a lot.
It’s your boyfriend’s hand staying on your shoulder or lowerback as he opens the door for you and lets you in first. It’s that hand that takes yours in it as you cross the road. It’s the kiss on your head when you really needed it.
It’s smiling at the guard and him smiling back and letting you in without scrutinizing every centemeter of your being. It’s staying in class after the 15-minute allowance for the teacher to show up has passed and her coming in with apologies and points for those who were still there.
It’s being listened to and not interrupted when you let out your feelings, hurts and problems. It’s being held close when you’re crying. And it’s deciding to say something when confronted about difficult things that really need to be talked about and not avoiding it or switching to a different subject or just keeping quiet.
Little things, like little seeds, can become something quite big.
*this isnt my piece.. i grabbed it from some random site and somehow when i read it.. it jsut struck me.. it seemed as if it was me who was writing the post when i was still completely sane.. when everything fell into place as it was supposed to.. when my life wasnt a mess.. i just hope there are better things in store for me,, coz right now ive got shitloads of problems and no one to run to,, my mom and steph is in the states,, most of my friends are nowhere to be found,, "we" broke up.. *we* dont share the same bond "we" used to have,, and as for me.. here i am.. standing alone.. with no one to save me.. PLEASE HELP ME IM GOING CRAZY*
2:31 PM
When you look with your eyes
Everything seems nice
But if you look twice
you can see it's all lies
1:28 PM
Monday, November 27, 2006
WE WILL MISS YOU BIM!
♥♥♥
12:36 AM
Sunday, November 26, 2006
friday
i was so pissed that coz of one stupid decision i fucked up everything
anyway, theres this angel who saved me from fucking up even more stuff.. HAHA. we talked nga pala.
how lame can my life be?saturday
despidida ni bimboy.. uhmm went to bim's with shem around 8 something.. then stayed till 3 or 4.. there were alot of people
period. haha anyway according to our studies dino talks every 7 seconds(on average & without cigarettes) hahaha.. proven ba? had fun and almost
everyone was drunk(well on our table that is).. I talked to people i never talked to before wala lang.. how i missed the thrill of meeting new people and getting to know them. YUCK. hahaha..
GOODVIBES. and BTW.
the drinks were great.. i love it. i love you Bim! haha then ardy, duane, dino, "baby teddy", gillian and mickey brought me home..Ü
*when i got home.. i felt uberly happy.
namiss ko yung ganto ehÜ.. wala lang..*
4:10 PM
Friday, November 24, 2006
i love the way you love me but i hate the way im supposed to love you back
9:58 AM
Thursday, November 23, 2006
prove me wrong
im begging you
1:24 AM
Wednesday, November 22, 2006
miss na miss na kita pero may parte ng katawan ko na naiinis pagkasama kita. alam mo kung bakit? kasi alam ko hindi ka akin.. hmm.. sabi nila mali daw na mahalin pa kita.. bat kaya? eh ANO BA kASing PAKIALAM NIYO. hahah joke lang. nababaliw nanaman ako.
ika nga nga nila meron daw tatlong lalaking aapekto sa buhay mo.. ung magmamahal sayo ng todo, ung mamahalin mo ng todo at yung pakakasalan mo. akalain mong.. wala lang. haha.
♥♥ There's always that one boy that no matter what he does, you just can't stop loving him ♥♥
9:56 PM
love me back. please?
12:51 PM
Well As for now I'm gonna hear the saddest songs
And sit alone and wonder
How you're making out
But as for me, I wish that I were anywhere with anyone
Making out.
I'm missing your laugh
How did it break?
And when did your eyes begin to look fake?
I hope you're as happy as you're pretending.
11:33 AM
I saw you with your new girl
Just yesterday
And I feel that I must confess
Even though it kills me to have to say
I'll admit that I was impressed
I guess I'll call it short of love and affection
Gotta commend you on your selection
Though I know I shouldn't be concerned
In the back of my mind I can't help but question
Does she rub your feet
When you've had a long day
And scratch your scalp
When you take out your braids
Does she know you like to play PS2
'Til 6 in the morning like i do
I can't explain this feeling (yeah)
I think about it everyday
And even though we've moved it on (uh huh)
It gets so hard to walk away
I'm gonna remember you, you're gonna remember me
Walk away
Forever you live in my memory
Walk away
I'm gonna remember you, you're gonna remember me
walk away
I can't forget how we used to be
I guess I have to live my life from day to day
Hoping maybe you'll...
11:17 AM
Monday, November 13, 2006
i looked around to find a piece of paradise i once owned when i was with you.. i found a few but it was not as beautiful as what we used to have.. dont mistake my actions for something else coz we both know that no matter what i do.. ill always.. always love you. i tried so hard to move on.. i tried so hard to let you go.. but the more i try the less i succeed.. ill try not to show the weakness you bring me.. coz we both know.. that if i do.. ide keep running back to you.. i miss you so much.. i miss everything we used to share.. i hate the fact that youre not mine and im not yours.. i hate myself for letting it happen.. but dont worry about me.. you know im strong.. you know i can make it.. im sorry if ive been such a bitch to you these past few weeks.. i just wanted to show you i could make it on my own.. ill be seeing you in 5 years, i promise.Ü
.. ill always be here for you
.. baby, i love you.
.. 30.
3:31 PM
Friday, November 10, 2006
coz im inlove with a gangster.
12:23 PM
I took a walk around the world to
Ease my troubled mind
I left my body laying somewhere
In the sands of time
I watched the world float to the dark
Side of the moon
I feel there is nothing i can do, yeah
I watched the world float to the
Dark side of the moon
After all I knew it had to be something
To do with you
I really don't mind what happens now and then
As long as you'll be my friend at the end
If I go crazy then will you still
Call me Superman
If I'm alive and well, will you be
There holding my hand
I'll keep you by my side with
My superhuman might
Kryptonite
You call me strong, you call me weak,
But still your secrets i will keep
You took for granted all the times I
Never let you down
You stumbled in and bumped your head, if
Not for me then you would be dead
I picked you up and put you back
On solid ground
If I go crazy then will you still
Call me Superman
If I'm alive and well, will you be
There holding my hand
I'll keep you by my side with
My superhuman might
Kryptonite
If I go crazy then will you still
Call me Superman
If I'm alive and well, will you be
There holding my hand
I'll keep you by my side with
My superhuman might
Kryptonite
Yeah
12:12 PM
Wednesday, November 08, 2006
BOOM TARAT TARAT. hahahahha. i miss stephaniebeybs!
9:31 PM
There I was an empty piece of a shell
Just minding my own world
Without even knowing
What love and life were all about
Then you came, you brought me out of the shell
You gave the world to me
And before I knew
There I was so in love with you
[refrain]
You gave me a reason for my being
And I love what i’m feeling
You gave me a meaning to my life
Yes, I’m gone beyond existing
And it all begun when I met you
I love the touch of your hair
And when I look in your eyes, i just know
I know I’m on to something good
And I’m sure my love for you will endure
Your love will light up my world
And take all my cares
Away where they can’t bother me
[repeat refrain]
[chorus]
You taught me how to love
You showed me a tomorrow and today, my love
That’s different from the yesterday I knew
You taught me to love and darling,
I will always cherish you
Today, tomorrow and forever
And I’m sure when evening comes around
I know we’ll be making love like never before
My love, who could ask for more
[repeat refrain]
9:25 PM
Friday, November 03, 2006
wala na si superman. asan si batman. teka muna. ABA TEKA.
2:29 PM
Just think of this and me
as just a few of the many things
to lie around
to clutter up your shelves
And I wish you weren't worth the wait
cause there's some things
I'd like to say to you...
And I don't think that you know what you've been missing
And I don't think that you know what you've been missing
And I dare you to forget
the marks you left
across my neck
from those nights when we were both
found at our best
I said I could make this obvious,
and you, you could deny it
all in one breath
Well come and shrug me off
your shoulders...
Well and I don't think that you know what you've been missing
Well and I don't think that you know what you've been missing
Well and I don't think that you know
It's that I don't think that you know
It's that I don't think that you know what you've been missing
Hey, lush, have fun
It's the weekend
Hey, lush, have fun
[x2]
(well, haven't you had enough)
Hey, lush, have fun
It's the weekend
Hey, lush, have fun
[x2]
(I don't think that you know what you've been missing)
(Just forget me it's that simple)
2:21 PM
(don't forget about us)
don't baby, don't baby, don't let it go
no baby, no baby, no baby no
don't baby, don't baby, don't let it go
my baby boy...
just let it die
with no goodbyes
details don't matter
we both paid the price
tears in my eyes
you know sometimes
it'd be like that baby
now everytime i see you
i pretend i'm fine
when i wanna reach out to you
but i turn and i walk and i let it ride
baby i must confess
we were bigger than anything
remember us at our best
and don't forget about
late nights, playin' in the dark
and wakin' up inside my arms
boy, you'll always be in my heart and
i can see it in your eyes
you still want it
so don't forget about us
i'm just speaking from experience
nothing can compare to your first true love
so i hope this will remind you
when it's for real, it's forever
so don't forget about us
oh they say
that you're in a new relationship
but we both know
nothing comes close to
what we had, it perseveres
that we both can't forget it
how good we used to get it
there's only one me and you
and how we used to shine
no matter what you go through
we are one, that's a fact
that you can't deny
so baby we just can't let
the fire pass us by
forever we'd both regret
so don't forget about
late nights, playin' in the dark
and wakin' up inside my arms
boy, you'll always be in my heart and
i can see it in your eyes
you still want it
so don't forget about us
i'm just speaking from experience
nothing can compare to your first true love
so i hope this will remind you
when it's for real, it's forever
so don't forget about us
and if she's got your head all messed up now
that's the trickery
she'll wanna have like you know how this lovin' used to be
i bet she can't do like me
she'll never be mc
baby don't you, don't you forget about us
late nights, playin' in the dark
and wakin' up inside my arms
boy, you'll always be in my heart and
i can see it in your eyes
you still want it
so don't forget about us
i'm just speaking from experience
nothing can compare to your first true love
so i hope this will remind you
when it's for real, it's forever
so don't forget about us
late nights, playin' in the dark
and wakin' up inside my arms
boy, you'll always be in my heart and
i can see it in your eyes
you still want it
so don't forget about us
i'm just speaking from experience
nothing can compare to your first true love
so i hope this will remind you
when it's for real, it's forever
so don't forget about us
don't baby, don't baby, don't let it go
no baby, no baby, no baby no
don't baby, don't baby, don't let it go
when it's for real, it's forever
so don't forget about us♥♥♥
2:00 PM
Sunday, October 29, 2006
SPACE.
o sabihin mo nga askin pano ko mareresolbahan ang dilemma ng buhay ko. aber?
9:11 PM
Wednesday, October 25, 2006
minamahal kita bat di ka maniwala, anong kelangan ko gawin upang seryosohin mo aking sinasabi tungkol sa pag ibig ko sayo minamahal kita bat hindi ka maniwala?
hello? ang sakit ng katawan ko.. and it even hurts more inside.. depression mode. anyway. sayang. alam ko. mahal na mahal kita. anyway. yung promises natin noon na pagnagbreak tayo and shit.. gagawin ko parin. maniwala ka man o hindi. gagawin ko yun. goodbye lover. i will miss you so much.
there are words left unspoken, actions left undone, dreams left unfulfilled and love left unexpressed.
12:03 PM
Sunday, October 22, 2006
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!
Salamat sa mga pumunta, sobra! wala lang.. andami kong nalaman nung gabing un.. how funny.. nakakainis ung iba.. nakakatuwa ung iba.. ROAR. tinatamad pa ko.. so ayusin ko mmaya.. hahahaha
12:53 PM
Friday, October 20, 2006
im bummed. i hate the fact that he cant make it to my birthday. oo alam ko MALI. pero that doesnt change the fact that he was and is the person i have ever truly truly loved. who will be my 18th dance? well, WHATEVER. para sakin.. sha parin last dance ko. i miss him. even if shit happened between us.
Yours Truly,
BUKEL
hahaha joke lang beb! ok na ko. ang sakit noh? ung nangyayari ngayon? pero ganun talaga eh nangyari na ang hindi dapat mangyari ever.. just be strong kaya mo yan at kaya ko rin toh.. tatag lang kelangan panindigan ang nagawa di ba? mahirap? OO. natural. sino ba may sabing madaling magmahal di ba? ingat. PARATI. ok?
Panalangin ko sa habang buhay, Makapiling ka, Makasama ka, Yan ang PANALANGIN KO.
10:36 AM
Thursday, October 19, 2006
beautifully broken.
wasap?
BUKEL
2:49 PM
You and me against the world
Sometimes it feels like you and me against the world
When all the others turn their back and walk away
You can count on me to stay
Remember when the circus came to town
And you were frightened by the clown?
Wasn't it nice to be around someone that you knew?
Someone who was big and strong and looking out for
You and me against the world
Sometimes it feels like you and me against the world
And for all the times we've cried I always felt that
The odds were on our side
And when one of us is gone
And one of us is left to carry on
Then remembering will have to do
Our memories alone will get us through
Think about the days of me and you
Of you and me against the world
Remember when the circus came to town
And you were frightened by the clown?
Wasn't it nice to be around someone that you knew?
Someone who was big and strong and looking out for
You and me against the world
Sometimes it feels like you and me against the world
And for all the times we've cried I always felt that
The odds were on our side
And when one of us is gone
And one of us is left to carry on
Then remembering will have to do
Our memories alone will get us through
Think about the days of me and you
Of you and me against the world
You and me against the world
You and me against the world
2:44 PM
Tuesday, October 10, 2006
11 days till my Birthday and i am nowhere near excited.
Most of my friends are of course. Steph went to my house around 10 am she nagged me about my birthday and everything else.. She arranged the program for me and well my other so called friends are stubborn enough not to agree with it! debut ko toh mahiya naman kayo! haha minsan lang toh.. pero i said to myself.. ok lang kung ayaw nila eh di wag.. haha
anyway.. i want to puke.
6:18 PM
Thursday, October 05, 2006
Dear Lover,
I just wanted to know how you were doing... I know we've been through so much shit lately specially you, you've been putting up with me since i arrived from the states and i cant believe you've come this far, don't get me wrong I'm glad you did. Last night was intense for me, I thought about everything literally EVERYTHING that happened between us. Remember our first month? We were quite a pair, a shocking couple for some... the best thing i remembered was we were inseparable, so much inlove, our intentions were so pure. The only thing we wanted to do was be with each other, nothing else mattered but us yeah US. I can still remember all the laughter and happiness we shared. I could still remember the exact feeling i had when you first held my hand in public, i can still feel it through my body everytime i think of it. Then summer came and i left i was bummed about the fact that i wouldn't be around during our first two monthsaries. I remember the look on your face the first time you saw me at the airport after two long months, your eyes were swollen due to lack of sleep. We spent the whole day together even if you weren't able to sleep the night before then we spent the whole day together the day after that as well. It was then you noticed how I've changed I've been distant and different, you knew i was acting weird but you didn't pay attention to it. You used to apologize all the time just to prevent us from fighting i was very abusive back then and still you stayed. I remember having problems with my family and i didn't want you to get involved you were so sad that i had shut you out, but you ended up being the solution to my problems, you were my savior. The other months went by as if it were seconds we kept on arguing and breaking up every so often that we kinda ruined our relationship. It wasn't until last night that i paid close attention to it and i didn't notice the damage I've done till now. I've done so much that the special love we used to share has faded away,maybe not completely but mostly. I have done so much damage to you.. me.. US.. that its unrepairable. i am wallowing in my own sadness, drowning in my own tears its eating me up inside. I really want to fix this but i don't know where to start.. i don't know if i can.. i don't if WE can.. I'm regretting everything i have said and done but i guess there's no point in doing so.. i don't know what to do coz i love you more now than i have ever loved you and for you.. its the other way around i know its my fault I've been so stubborn.. I've taken advantage of what you've given me.. I'm lost. Everyone thinks were both happy coz they all think were the perfect pair, we have our differences but we were crazy about each other.. maybe that's the only thing important but what about us?will our memories be the only thing left for us to love? I've been thinking, really thinking.. i know I've been such a bitch to you but I will make it up to you i swear. i cant lose you! i need you! i love you! i don't want to end up regretting letting you go without doing anything.. i believe in our relationship.. i wont give up. i promise.
♥♥♥
Bea
2:40 AM
Monday, October 02, 2006
who's shitting on who?
kat jam and mela came by our house awhile ago.. nakauniform.. kinabahan ako kala ko may pasok sila lang pala kasi may project sila.. haha anyway.. finals na ng Filipino on Wednesday.. last ko na un.. or kung itatake ko ung sa history.. hmm lemme think.. anyway.. rina called me up awhile ago nagpapasama sa mc.. eh nalalagnat ako at nagsusuka eww. kaya sabi ko may sakit ako.. after a few minutes.. naisip ko bigla... THERE IS NO WAY IM GON' BE STUCK HERE THE WHOLE DAY DOING NOTHING.. seryoso.. even if im hella sick.. i aint stayin home.. atleast i have to check out whatts happening to the world.. siguro nga kelangan namin balikan ng tingin ung mundo ng wala ang isa't isa.. oohh nooh. anyway. nakakatamad umalis.. kakain na nga lang ako.
2:51 PM
Sunday, October 01, 2006
I couldn't sleep last night because I know that it's over between us. I'm not bitter anymore, because I know that what we had was real. And if in some distant place in the future we see each other in our new lives, I'll smile at you with joy and remember how we spent the summer beneath the trees, learning from each other and growing in love. The best love is the kind that awakens the soul and makes us reach for more, that plants a fire in our hearts and brings peace to our minds, and that's what you've given me. That's what I hope to give to you forever. I love you. I'll be seeing you
Well that's what we do, we fight... You tell me when I am being an arrogant son of a bitch and I tell you when you are a pain in the ass. Which you are, 99% of the time. I'm not afraid to hurt your feelings. You have like a 2 second rebound rate, then you're back doing the next pain-in-the-ass thing. So what?
So it's not gonna be easy. It's gonna be really hard.
We're gonna have to work at this every day, but I want to do that because
I want you. I want all of you, for ever, you and me, every day. Will you do something for me, please? Just picture your life for me? 30 years from now, 40 years from now? What's it look like? If it's with him, go. Go! I lost you once, I think I can do it again. If I thought that's what you really wanted. But don't you take the easy way out.
Noah: I am nothing special; just a common man with common thoughts, and I've led a common life. There are no monuments dedicated to me and my name will soon be forgotten. But in one respect I have succeeded as gloriously as anyone who's ever lived: I've loved another with all my heart and soul; and to me, this has always been enough.
6:23 PM
wala na.
kasalanan ko.
bobo rin kasi eh.
baka nga sawa na ko.
sawa sa pagaaway natin.
mahal na mahal kita.
ang sakit noh?
talikuran ka ng mahal mo?
ramdam eh.
TAGOS.
kayanin ko kaya.
ng wala ka?
parang hindi eh.
tangina.
wala na ba
talaga?
sino ang nag give up
sino ang nagmahal
sino ang tanga
sino ang talo
wala
patas lang siguro
hindi ko sinasadya
alam ko sasabihin mo
hindi nanaman
sinasadya
SORRY.
seryoso.
time and space
baby
i love you this much
ayokong masira tayo
ng ganito
6:08 PM
Wednesday, September 27, 2006
naprove ko? well naprove mo rin dont worry.
ang sakit noh? alam ko.
what im feeling is beyond what youre doing to me..
it just goes to show how much i mean to you...
how much you dont want to care for me...
how much you dont want to understand me...
how much you want to give up on me...
maybe ive given you enough reasons to quit.. .
buttt do you have to torture me this much?
think about it babe!
look at what youre dealing with?
look at yourself...
take a good look on whats happening..
just stop.. and think...
are you that willing to give up on us...
12:42 PM
you used to believe in magic? well i did too.. i still want to but youre giving me reason not to.. ang sakit na ayaw mo kong intindihin despite the facts that i will be responsible about it.. i am so confused.
10:21 AM
Monday, September 25, 2006
i am sooo dead by the end of the sem.. well believe it or not.. i am passing my subjects.. but the thing is i have to get a perfect grade in all my subjects to pass the first sem.. why? coz of the subjects i dropped .. wahh hells gon break lose...
11:04 PM
labyu. haha i know i can be extremely intolerable at times.. but i salute you my man! haha. wala lang. first runner up sa cheering sila komi champion.. woohoo.. i thought theyd win.. anyway.. had a fight nanaman kanina.. well wala lang actually hindi pala wala lang.. it was something.. and i think.. naayos. seryoso. naniniwala akong naayos.
10:47 PM
Sunday, September 24, 2006
OMG.
i am extremely sad right now.
10:06 PM
how long will you put up with this insanity called love? its not all that easy i know.. but ide rather be insane and happy with you than be normal and sad without you.
10:01 PM
Thursday, September 21, 2006
i am uberly PISSED at what you're doing to meperiod.
SOBRA!SOBRA!SOBRA! ikaw na nga ang may kasalanan ako pa ginaganito mo! the POINT IS YOU STILL DID IT! do you understand me ? or do i have to repeat it again and again till its stuck in your mind till your thirty? GAD. ikaw pa may ganang magalit ah! seryoso. ANG KAPAL. THE NERVE. i am seriously furious.
7:24 PM
Wednesday, September 20, 2006
hell will break lose pagpinagpatuloy mo yang ugali mo babae.
miss na miss na kita! sobra! lalo na kanina problemado ako.. wala akong pake sa ibang tao natural na ikaw lang hinahanap ko.. i love you!
7:39 PM
Tuesday, September 19, 2006
i know ive been increasingly tolerant these past few days, coz i know i have done alot of mistakes... but that doesnt mean you can take me for granted ive been tolerating your impossible rantings about things so please.. can you just drop the act coz you know ive had it up to my neck with you. Parang ikaw may hanganan ka rin naman di ba. SOBRA KA MAKABINTANG. alam mo un hindi naman ako nagrereklamo kasi in fact these past few days are the best days in our relationship since i left for the states.. help me out naman. i cant do this on my own. im trying my best for this to work out but if youre not willing to do anything... then why should i?
5:07 PM
i sill be creating a new blog soon.. kasi naman.. naghahalo ung school and uhm.. hindi school. hahaha.
2:31 PM
BTW.. its official.. the First year CDE class will be split into two.. awww sayang naman ung bond.. i hate it.. were like 40 and next sem theres gonna be like 20 of us left in a class.. AWWW.. officially 13 days to go nalang kaiiniiissss.. fuck shit. im gonna miss them.. no shit. i really thought i wouldnt be able to get along with them but lately.. WAH. iyak na ko. hahaha.
1:18 PM
being with you is blissfully insane.
i love you
1:03 PM
monday cheering practice was hella tiring.. although i know all those practices paid off coz when we saw the video.. GGAAAHH it was gorgeous.. im not so sure abotu the pompoms though.. sinisira niya ung steps eh.. haha slept late last night i had to finish my MC culture last project.. and my pompoms are uhmm 2% finished damn. went straight to redtag after practicing only to find out.. the one im waiting for wont show up i hate it! anyway.. grabe ka makasumbat ah.. excuse me.. when i arrived in blue skies nung sunday you were playing and you even played for two more hours and you said i kept you waiting. yeah... whatever. thats a different case get serious man! anyway.. nevermind. ohh yeah.. i went to 3 national bookstores yesterday gaadddddd fuckin pompoms.. National Katipunan didn't have the colors i needed.. National Sta. Lu had blue.. and taadaaaa national tropical had it all pla.. naku naku naku.. anyway.. whatever.
12:48 PM
1. Whatever you do, don't just show up at their house [without notice]...they run around in their underwear just like we do.2. DON'T CHEAT ON THEM. It may seem foolproof, but girls tell each other everything about everything. Trust me, they WILL find out and you will be mad.3. Beware of every single male relative and all guy friends. Any of them would kick your ass at the drop of a hat, and a lot of them wouldn't even wait for the hat.4. NEVER miss an opportunity to tell them they're beautiful.5. DON'T refuse to kiss in front of your friends. If they laugh at you, it's because they're jealous.6. If they slap you hard, you deserved it.7. Don't be afraid to touch them if you want to. If they're going out with you in the first place, it's because they like being in your arms.8. If you don't sleep with them, DO NOT tell your friends that you did.9. If you DO sleep with them, DON'T tell your friends that you did.10. You can be dirty minded in private, really...most of them are not offended by it...11. Not all of them eat like birds, a lot of them can eat like whales.12. Most of them don't mind paying half of everything, but they do discuss these things with their friends. Realize that if you make your girlfriend pay half all the time, everyone will know about it and your friends will know you're a pussy..13. Every girl should eventually get three things from her boyfriend- a stuffed animal, ONE OF HIS SWEATSHIRTS, and a really PRETTY RING. Even if it's not a serious relationship.14. Make sure she gets home safely as often as you can. If you're dropping her off, walk her to the door. If you aren't dropping her off, call to be sure she's home safely. (i couldnt agree more!)15. If a guy is bothering her, it is your right to beat the shit out of him.16. If you're talking to a female friend of yours, PULL YOUR GIRLFRIEND CLOSER.(MEN, JUST DO THIS IF YOU LOVE YOUR WOMAN OKAY, YOU KNOW THEY'RE SENSITIVE)17. NEVER, ever slap her, even if it's just in a joking way. Even if she swats you first, and says, "Oh, you're so dumb" or something, never make any gestures back.18. Go to a chick flick once in a while. She doesn't care whether you enjoy it or not, it just matters that you went.19. You're dead meat if you can't get along with their pets, parents, and best friends. Be prince charming to their friends, Mr. Polite to their parents, and make sure to be nice to their animals.20. Don't flirt with their moms...that's just freaky.21. Don't be freaked out by PMS. It's not gross, and it really does make them feel like shit, so be understanding.22. If you don't like the way they drive, you do it.23. Don't stress where you go for every date. They really only want to be with you.24. If they complain that something hurts, rub it for them WITHOUT being asked.25. Girls are fragile. Even if you're play fighting/wrestling, be very gentle.26. Memorize their birthdays. You forget her birthday and you're basically screwed for life.27. Don't marinade the cologne, but smell good.28. Don't give her something stupid for her birthday or Christmas or Valentine's day. It doesn't have to be expensive, but it has to be meaningful.29. If you think the relationship isn't going to last, don't wait to find out. It will only hurt her more if you draw it out.30. After you've been dating for a while, realize that they really have started to trust you. When you have a girlfriend who truly trusts you, you have a lot more responsibility, privilege and control than you would think. Be careful with it, most guys would kill for that kind of power, and it can be lost in a nanosecond.31. NEVER, and i mean NEVER make her do anything she doesn't wanna do. Because if you do she'll think that you're only after one thing.
*this is from arra's multiply blog and i think she got it from someone else.. so salamat.*
12:38 PM
